I think there is a challenge between the very real issue of busyness in our lives today and the smoke screen of busyness. Are we really busier than our parents were, are we really run off our feet more than our grandfathers were? I certainly cannot answer that conclusively, but I am not sure we are? Maybe there are just more activities in the 21st century of relax and recreation that we are hedonistically attracted to. More for us to do and enjoy. And the time left over after work, gets divided between our selfish desires and family time. Unfortunately our families could end up taking the hit. Whilst we naively think that these activities are inclusive for our family, the reality is, more often than not they are selfishly driven and not sacrificially facilitated.
The problem then is that when we are encouraged to prioritise time with family, we default to this excuse of busyness. Friends we need to pursue simplicity and be faithful with the Godly gift of family. Here are a few things that we have learnt along the way that have been helpful to us in valuing our family time (always a work in progress):
1. Eat together : whilst much of life takes place on the run, we all have to eat. We all have to stop, we have to breathe, enjoy. Please don't make a habit of eating "alone together". Life undoubtedly can be busy, understood! We somehow manage to eat together maybe around four times a week. They are not necessarily exceptional moments, but they are most certainly special moments. As a family we love "Cake Boss", and it so happens to be on around dinner time. It is far too easy to settle for chow around the TV, it takes effort and intention, make the effort and intention to value this moment of sharing a meal. PVR or TVO Cake Boss or eat earlier :-) !!
2. Pray together : let prayer be you default response to challenges in life. We automatically want to work things out and understand the challenges we face. I have always found that prayer facilitates vulnerability, and what better place to be vulnerable than before God. Taking your hard issues, good times and the issues and circumstances you don't understand, to God. Fathers, don't underestimate the value of being vulnerable before your family, you don't know everything, don't pretend that you do, take it to God.
3. Play together: We want magical, spontaneous family moments. We have found the best way to have awesome times together is to plan for them. I know that doesn't sound spontaneous. You may have enjoyed a few spontaneous magical moments, but in general that are a myth. When Saturday comes around and you have no plan, don't expect it to fly, you've got a dead dodo on your hands. Invest thought in the times that are coming up and be intentional about playing together.
Hey, these are just a few things we have found helpful, three simply ways of keeping our finger on the pulse of our family.
God bless
Steve and Bron
Great post full of practical advice.
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